Resilience versus accuracy is a topic I picked up from Seth Godin. Here’s his quote.
Resilience is the best strategy for those realistic enough to admit that they can’t predict the future with more accuracy than others.
Resilience isn’t a bet on one outcome, instead, it’s an investment across a range of possible outcomes, a way to ensure that regardless of what actually occurs (within the range), you’ll do fine.
This has helped me in ways too numerous to count. It has helped me face my fears and to feed my confidence in my ability to make decisions.
Have you ever tried to really pin point what you are fearful about? We know the feeling in the pit of our stomach. Have you ever tried try to really define what it is we’re afraid of?
Often times, aren’t we afraid of being wrong?
The big red X on our paper in elementary school, etched in our brain telling us from the age of 5 into eternity that there are clearly right and wrong answers. My teacher told me so. The goal is to get them all right. Avoid the big red X. Get a good grade. Study all night, lose sleep the night before the test hoping you’re ready.
I’ve assessed this as an adult and I’m struggling to find enough evidence that my elementary teachers were right. There seems to be far more degrees of right and wrong outside the walls of my elementary school. Once we step above the 10 Commandments and the basics of hygiene, life has more “what’s right for me, and what’s right for you” choices. The absolutes and the accuracy of a 2nd grade spelling tests are long gone. Yet we can get caught in the trap of wanting to be right and to avoid the big red X. Accuracy.
I now prefer resilience, to set out on the journey of defining our path and being clear about what we’re trying to achieve. It’s only after we have defined those things that are important to us, that we can define what is right and what is wrong…. for us.
And too many times my path has taken enough twists and turns to leave me reaching for the Dramamine; a little queasy from navigating the motions and emotions of change. It’s then I feast on resilience. It’s impossible to know all of the right answers but I can be confident that I will adjust to the new situations and enjoy the journey along the way.
And what about those times that a wrong answer or a complete fail have given us the clarity for what is right. What if we never fail? What can really be learned without the twists and turns? You’ve likely heard the failure stats on Abe Lincoln and Thomas Edison and the number of failures it took them to get to success. Are we willing to forgo great innovation or advancement in our life that we aren’t willing to fail a time or two in the pursuit?
Our lives can never be completely accurate. Instead we must be confident in our ability to be resilient. Accuracy requires us to be right and wrong, Resiliency says we learn, adapt, and don’t give up
This topic is covered in my training Parenting Your ADD/ADHD Child – How to Overcome Fear and Uncertainty by Raising Confident ADD Kids. My partner DeShawn Wert is an ADD Coach and uses this class with the families of her coaching clients. She also writes about overcoming fear and failure. She asked me to write a post she could share with her readers. DeShawn is genuine caring and dedicated to helping others. I recommend you follow her and sign up for her newsletter. www.deshawnwert.com